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Maybe in some dystopian future, we’ll all be tracked and identified wherever we go. Bar codes tattooed on our foreheads. Or maybe regular retina scans a la Minority Report. Once something like that’s in place, it’ll be hard to remain a fugitive for very long, won’t it? In the mean time, plenty of hoods seem determined to do whatever they can to make themselves just about as identifiable as they’d be if they were bar coded. It’s hard to imagine it took long to track this guy down, for instance. Similarly, Chicago’s finest didn’t have to chew up much shoe leather finding Donnie Whitworth…

Donnie was without transportation Friday and evidently had an appointment for which being late was not an option. According to officer.com:

Whitworth, 29 -­ whose ghostly complexion apparently earned him the nickname “Casper”­­­ — allegedly stole a couple’s 2002 Chevrolet Blazer at gunpoint in the 5700 block of West Grand on Friday.

He allegedly hit the 27-year-old driver with the butt of his gun, then also ordered a 38-year-old woman who’d been a passenger from the SUV before he sped off.

One of the carjacking victims later picked Casper the Heavily Tatted Ghost out of a photo lineup. And the CPD didn’t have to issue an APB in order to reel him in.

Previously known to police, he was arrested Saturday in the 5700 block of West Belden and charged with aggravated vehicular hijacking.

In addition to tattoos honoring several dead friends, Whitworth, of the 2200 block of North Mango, has a tattoo that reads “Belden City,” according to the report.

Mr. Whitworth currently resides in a facility at the courtesy of the fine people of the Windy City. He’s probably whiling away the hours planning to move out of his mother’s basement – once he serves his prison sentence, that is – which will at least make finding him more of a challenge when he commits his next crime. Unless, of course, he’s in the pokey long enough that nationwide retina scanning becomes the rule and then he’ll be pretty much SOL.

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4 COMMENTS

  1. Casper gets away with this because people who pay their bills and earn a living are not allowed to be armed. Casper would be real ghost pretty quick in a carry state if he yanked open the wrong door.

    Since I don’t live there my tax dollars don’t feed Donny and give him weights to lift and TV to watch. Hence he’s their problem.

  2. Casper & his ilk, along with A.G. Holder and his JBT, (aka ATF), are my two top reasons for believing that CCL’s need to be replaced with CAN {Carry As Needed}, Licenses that are GIVEN to citizens.

    Unfortunately, such wisdom escapes the “Beltway bimbos” and “P. C. enforcers”.

    Even criminals are smart enough to “get it” that once the GP is ARMED at WILL, crime will cease to have such a sweet flavor…because criminals ARE criminals BECAUSE they do NOT want to have to WORK hard…they just WANT to be supported through easily obtained products and items. and, they certainly do NOT want a lead breakfast, lunch, snack, or dinner.

  3. Almost didn’t click on the link for the guy. Haven’t laughed that hard in a long time. Would you call his appearance a choice or a mental disorder?

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