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Earlier today, Ernie’s House of Whoop Ass! linked to TTAG. Young Master Ernest’s recommendation was as succinct as it was sarcastic: “how to not freak out in a gunfight. by a guy who has never been in one.” True dat. I have never been in a gunfight. And I hope to God I never will. Meanwhile, let it be known that I don’t just make shit up. In terms of psychology, I have a degree. I was a hypnotist for ten years. In terms of guns, I spend twelve hours a day learning about firearms from every possible angle. And I cheat. Not only do I consult (i.e. steal) from gun gurus, I base my ideas on common sense. And I test my theories. For example, the rant “Nothing is Better Than A Small Gun. Literally” . . .

That post was a piercing glimpse into the obvious. But sometimes you have to enter the House of Duh to remind people not to over-complicate matters. Especially when you’re talking about life or death decisions. So, anyway, here’s a novice shooter (one day’s experience) shooting a Charter Arms Undercover .38 (above) and a Smith & Wesson 686 (below). It’s Chris’ first time firing both guns. Note: she was aiming for the hostage [gray head].

I know it’s a foregone conclusion. And I realize that the Smith & Wesson 686 is not the most practical of carry guns. But not everyone is carrying (think: home defense). And to quote Clint Smith (a man who forgot more about gunfighting than I’ll ever know), a gun is supposed to be comforting, not comfortable. Or, as the rabbi says (same knowledge gap), lose two pounds and get a proper gun FFS.

As for my assertion that breathing slowly is the key to mental acuity in battle, I’m heading back to Tiverton to test that one out as well. One shooter (reasonably experienced). Three targets. Shouted instructions. One shot number one! Two shots number three! No shots number four! Etc. First, after rapid breathing. Second, with paced controlled breathing.

May the best breather—not BS artist—win.

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